Flames

Tiny timbers up my toes
Eyes alight
Skin a glow

Flames running up my legs
Body tenses
Muscles ache

Tiny prickles up my spine
Fingers tighten
Lungs ache

Flames dancing along my face
Eyes shut
Sigh escapes

Tiny tingles up my side
Arms shake
Bodies rise

Flames erupt as bodies dance
Fingers trace where sweat began
Eyes tell the ecstacy
As bodies become body

Whispered names and promises
Tell me you love me, tell me again
As flames subside
Sleep sets in

Wishes

Wishing you could be here
and see what I see

Wishing you could be here
and feel what I feel

Wishing you could be here
and take the pain away

Wishing you could be here
and tell me everythings okay

Wishing you could be here
and hold me close

Wishing you could be here
and take us both to bed

Wishing you could be here
and make everyone else go away

Wishing you could be here yourself, in person
Instead of stuck in my heart and head

Numb

Staring at the floor
Holding on by a thread
I refuse to play your games anymore
Sitting numb on the floor

Leave me here to sit in silence
Go play your part, your staring role
Be the drama major and go do your scene
While I sit numb on the floor

Tears will fall, though none will sting quite like mine
Hearts will be broken, even if its only mine
Limbs are weak, will is almost gone
Sitting numb on the floor

I can't feel my heart
I've deadened my senses to hide
I don't want to see anymore of your drama tonight
While I sit here helpless and numb on the floor

Mirror shows what I've known all along
There's nothing left of who I used to be
You tore me up and left me here
Sitting numb on the floor

You go ahead and play your role
I'll fight this feeling
I'll fight back until the end, then
You will be the one sitting numb on the floor
Crying like the raven "Nevermore"

Lie Again

Tell me again
go ahead
hang around
tell it again
give you rope
all you need
you'll hang yourself
no help you'll need
lie again
dig your holes
dig your ditches
be so bold
go ahead
tell your tales
lie again
make me sick
tell it again
all that you do
say what you said
go ahead
tell your lies again
no one to save you
no one could
so go ahead
lie again

Drowning Again

Sinking deeper
Air won't come
Eyes wide open
Feel so cold

Body heavy
Feel so weak
Pushing hard
Fighting sleep

Phantom scars
Show so well
Won't go back there
Not again

Eyes cloud
Ears won't hear
Mouth won't work
Though the screams still there

Hands are shaking
Legs pulled close
Can't think straight
Feel so broken

And here I am
So stuck again
Here I go
Drowning again

Feeling Indescribable

Heart pounds
Hands shake
Choke up
Make a mistake

Stutter
Butterflies
All dizzy inside

Feeling so strange
Crazy
Insane

You smile
Heart skips
Insides do a flip

How do you do what you do to me?
Feel wanted
Feel so free

Lip trembles
Toes tap
Feel like such a sap

Eyes shine
Laughter bubbles
Loving how you make me feel

Wish that I could do the same
You are so wonderful
So magical
So inspirational

Breath catches
Spine tingles
Life changes
Has a meaning

Your amazing
Your so smart
And I can’t help
But give you my heart

Decisions

To look into my eyes
I’m sure you would see
How my past decisions
Still haunt me

I choose someone once
Someone I thought loved me
I found out the hard way that
It wasn’t meant to be

I thought I’d try again
This time with someone I knew better
Only to find out that I knew them too well
It didn’t feel right to me

Two decisions I have made
That my mind always replays
Assaulting my heart everyday
Two deep scars and scared as hell

Then I met an angel
I was scared but he didn’t push
He listened, He cared
He was always there with advice

Above all I got to be myself
He is sweet
He is kind
He gives a damn

I have yet to meet a better man
I’ll take a chance
I’ll be bold
I’ll try again and see how it goes

Someone I Can't Be

Staring into the darkness
Staring into your eyes
I've never felt so lonely
You want someone I just can't be

Your one of my best friends
Your like an older sibling to me
I could never see you as anything other
You want someone I just can't be

Holding a torch for me
Holding a hope that just can't be
I wish this was easier to explain
You want someone I just can't be

Saying you want me, and me alone
Saying you think of me as the only one
Makes me want to cry
You want someone I just can't be

It's true that I love you
Though it's not like you love me
To tell you this is killing me
You want someone I just can't be

I don't know what else to say
I can't explain how I feel enough
So, I won't say anything at all because
I won't be something or someone I just can't be

Build These Walls

I'll build up these walls
I 'll keep you away
I'll keep you out
It'll scare you away

I can build up these walls
I can push you away
I can keep you out
Yet you seem to stay

I can fight
I can scream
I can push
Yet still you stay

I'm confused
I'm unprepared
I'm at a lose for words
How can you do what you do to me?

I built up these walls
To keep all away
To keep me safe
To scare everyone away

Yet your still here
You haven't run
You aren't afraid
And you're tearing the walls away

I'm afraid to let you in
Its been so long
Its been so hard
Its so strange to feel this way

I built these walls in my defense
Once burned turns you shy
Twice burned turns you away
Three times burned...
Now all I can seem to do is run away

I built these walls so long ago
Fought so hard to keep them up
You came along not long ago
You tore them down without a second thought

My heart go wild
My breathe comes fast
My mind fights saying it will never last
My body aches from scars since past

I want to believe
I want to hope
I want it to not be all just another beautiful lie
The ruins around my feet leave me exposed and raw

I look at you with eyes full of hope, a body full of scars, and a heart full of holes
Everything I have, whatever is left is yours
I'll give all of my broken self to you and pray that you know what to do

Breathing Deep

My eyes close as the calm leaves me
Why does this have to happen to me?
Hands clenched by my side, I bow my head
Is it time to give in?
Is it time to give up?

To feel so weak
To feel so worn down and broken
To realize there maybe no way to win
To realize there maybe no way to move on

Not wanting to drown
Not wanting to feel
Not knowing if there is a way
Just knowing it will always be a struggle

But I just know that I'm not ready to give in yet
Not ready to give up
Not ready to end this way
I stiffen quickly as I stand tall

I have a choice
I can give in and let things boil
Give in body, mind and soul
Or I can fight back
Push back and give whatever I have left

I can't stand feeling weak
I will stand strong
No matter the scars or the bruises I collect along the way
I'll hold my head up high through all the pain
Hoping and knowing that somehow it will be better someday

I breathe deep and open my eyes
I breathe deep and slowly realize that what happens now is up to me
What I choose to do
What I choose to see
What I choose to learn
What I choose to acknowledge
What I choose to be

Breathing deep
Stand up tall
Look out fate we're in for a brawl

Thorn In My Side

Thorn in my side
driving me mad
driving me crazy
making me sad

Thorn in my side
needs to be free
needs to get out
far away from me

Thorn in my side
ripping me apart
while slowly killing me inside

Thorn in my side
slipping further and further
digging deeper everyday

Why is this thorn in my side here you may ask?
Its the product of losing my faith,
then losing my love,
then feeling no need to live

Thorn in my side
and no way to remove it

Thorn in my side
and no way to hide it

Dare Ya To

I dare ya to notice...
to notice im not there

I dare ya to care...
to care for me

I dare you to need....
need me if im not there

I dare ya to wish...
to wish i was there

I dare ya to miss..
miss me if im not near

I dare ya to whisper..
to whisper sweet things in my ear

I dare ya to listen..
to listen to what your heart says

I dare ya to yearn..
to yearn for my prescence

I dare ya to love...
to love me like i do you

I dare ya to give a damn..
to give a damn how i feel about you